I have written this post million times in my head, usually just before falling asleep. I have finally bit the bullet and will try to put my somehow chaotic thoughts into words.
I have found some amazing blogs and will be writing a post on which nonfiction books I want to read based on all those fantastic posts from fellow bloggers I read last month.
I am an avid reader that enjoys living on different planets, solving crime mysteries, learning new skills and theories, imagining alternative words and much more.
Books have always been my safety blanket and I am forever grateful that there are here for me to read. With that said, I haven’t read or listened to a book for more than two weeks.
A few weeks ago, me and my family lost our beloved grandmother, whom I was very close to. I am still processing all those emotions that range from anger, sadness, grief, despair, hope etc. I am finding it hard to read right now as my attention wonders a lot and I just can not concentrate.
Side note: I’m at utter peace with not reading. I am focusing on feeling what I need to feel right now.
Before I end this post, let me tell you a little bit about the person I miss everyday.
My grandma was the type of person, who would not use heating to save money, but then she would give that money to her children and grandchildren. She taught me how to see the good in everyone, how laughter and singing can heal us and how fulfilling it is to serve others.
I lived with her during my late teenage years and learned so much about her childhood during World War II as well as our extended family history. She always cherished peanut butter as it reminded her the end of the war – when the American soldiers brought it with them whilst freeing our country.
She was my favourite person and I am so angry she had to go. I sometimes forget she is no longer with us – for example when I see something I think she would like, I immediately think ‘what a great Christmas gift this will be for her’. I sometimes think ‘I need to tell her xyz next time I talk to her’. And then I remember… Moments like these can rip our hearts open and sadness comes in another wave yet again.
I know I’m not the only one feeling a loss. Our lives are precious. I am reminding myself to let my loved ones know how much they mean to me on a regular basis.
I’m not writing this post to make you sad. I am writing it to celebrate one wonderful life that touched so many hearts.
And to let you all know how glad I am that you are here.❤️
Happy reading my friends!